We Who Feel Differently

Translator's Note: This is a machine-assisted translation completed on May 16, 2025. While care has been taken to maintain accuracy, this translation has not yet undergone human review or validation. Please note that specialized terms, historical references, and nuanced content may benefit from expert review.

In 1957, Øivind Eckhoff (1916–2001) published the book Vi som føler annerledes (We Who Feel Differently – Homosexuality and Society) under the pseudonym Finn Grodal. The book was the first Norwegian non-fiction work published about homosexuality and was addressed to the general public, professionals, and homosexuals themselves—though it was perhaps within the latter group that the book made the greatest impact. In the foreword, Øivind Eckhoff wrote:

“The book is not intended for any specific, limited readership. It is addressed not only to the heterosexual public, but also to homosexuals themselves; not only to academics, but to anyone with intellectual curiosity about the human mind; not only to medical professionals, but also—to some extent—to the experts in the field: psychiatrists, neurologists, psychoanalysts, and psychologists.”
(Grodal 1957:16)

In contrast to the academic literature that inspired Eckhoff (including the Danish Why Are They Like That – A Study of the Problems of Homosexuality, edited by Jarl Wagner Smitt, and The Homosexual in America: A Subjective Approach by D.W. Cory), We Who Feel Differently represented the perspective of someone who identified as homosexual. Grodal wrote:

“In my opinion, it is highly desirable that the problems surrounding homosexuality, for once, be illuminated also from the homosexual’s own point of view.”
(1957:18)

Many queer readers at the time expressed deep appreciation that “one of their own” was speaking on their behalf, and several wrote personal letters to “Finn Grodal” afterward. Eckhoff believed these letters offered a unique insight into the lives of homosexuals, and he eventually had the idea to publish a collection of them in book form. In 1958, he organized a manuscript titled The Silent Speak Out. Unfortunately, the manuscript was never published, but copies are archived at the Norwegian Queer Archive (Skeivt arkiv).

We Who Feel Differently was printed in 4,000 copies in Scandinavia, and despite receiving little public attention, all copies were sold within ten years. The book covered a wide range of topics, balancing accessible presentations of contemporary research with descriptions of homosexuals and their life situations, and offering advice to both homosexuals and other groups in society. The book concludes with “7 special appeals” directed at specific groups that Eckhoff believed could benefit from specialized information and guidance.

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The book, in many ways, made a new conceptual framework around homosexuality more accessible, and was also important in introducing the terms “homosexual” and “bisexual” into the discourse on homosexuality in the late 1950s. It was also one of the first books to mention “lesbian” as a term for female homosexuals in a Norwegian context.

Eckhoff, together with his partner Arne Heli, had been an important figure in the Norwegian Association of 1948 (DNF-48) from its inception, and in the book, he supported the organization’s politics of respectability. For example, Grodal writes:

“We inverts are the way we are simply because we cannot be otherwise. And we certainly did not ask to become homosexuals!”
(1957:23)

This perspective aligns with the general appeal that the public should “tolerate” homosexuals as a minority who were not “at fault” for their sexual identity. Grodal also writes:

“For the homosexual who does not live in a stable relationship—and that is the vast majority—it is definitely an advantage that his sexual appetite is not unnecessarily large. (...) The temptation toward unrestrained promiscuity, with minimal selectiveness in choosing partners, should not become too strong.”
(1957:206–207)

Distancing from “excessive sexual behavior” was a strategy DNF-48 followed for a long time, and it was also part of the foundation of the culture of discretion within the organization.

We Who Feel Differently is definitely a product of its time and may appear outdated to modern readers. In particular, the chapter “Prevention of Homosexuality” and the descriptions of an internal struggle with self-acceptance as universal among homosexuals have been criticized in retrospect.

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Gerd Brantenberg, another prominent queer author, also mocked Grodal’s causal explanations in her debut novel Rise Up, All the World’s Homosexuals from 1973.
Nevertheless, Finn Grodal’s book is highly important for understanding the historical moment at the end of the 1950s and the dominant discourse of the time. We Who Feel Differently also, in many ways, marks the beginning of Norwegian queer scholarship and is an important early source for understanding the development of the academic field.

The book has also left its mark on popular culture—for example, by inspiring the theater production Vi som føler annleis (“We Who Feel Differently” in Nynorsk), which was staged at Det Norske Teatret in 2015.